The Upstory

(*See end of story for info about scams like I encountered.)

Back in the olden days I entertained myself with phone scammers. I’d get a call from someone who would ask “is Ted there?” And I’d say, “Yes, but he’s too drunk to come to the phone.”

And we’d be off and running. Usually, the scammer was telling me something was wrong with my computer (Luddite Me: What is this ‘com-puter’ that you speak of?) and we would have a fun few minutes on the phone going back and forth until Scam Dude got frustrated and ended the call. That was my goal. When I can get a scammer to hang up on me, I win. But now there’s a whole new game afoot. To be fair, it’s probably been around for a while, it’s just new to me.

My first mistake was doing business on my phone while watching Monday Night Football. I was paying attention to the Saints tight ends when I should have been watching my own back-end.

All I wanted was a couple of air tags for my dogs’ collars. I thought I’d done my due diligence (C’mon, Defense!) because I read the reviews on the product. I also should have been double-checking the entity taking my money and delivering the product.

Here’s what I read about the entity I did business with after it was too late:

“Most reviewers are let down by their experience. Customers express significant dissatisfaction with their orders because of:
* overcharges
* never receiving orders
* not getting refunds.”

Holy fraud alert, Batman!

But I was unaware. Innocent. Distracted. (Hey! Interference!)

In the third quarter, I hit the buy button and got an email receipt for two tags and a delivery confirmation for two days hence.

Nothing to see here. Move along. We’re all good.

But wait. Insert theme from Jaws. Dum-dum, dum-dum, eerie horns.

The next day Glenn is going over online charges, as he is wont to do, and by golly there’s not one but two charges for air tags. Somehow, I’m getting three more tags with a second credit card charge. Weird.

I don’t remember doing a second order (Go Saints!) but maybe I did. Although, I didn’t get a receipt or delivery confirmation. Oh well, I’ll just cancel the second order and get a refund.

And that, folks, is how I entered the wonderful world of “brushing” scams (see info at end). Woo-hoo! Meet RCH-Olladeals. Also known as RCHshopperoc. They go by a handful of names. And if you think I sent back the product and got a refund, think again. That’s what Amazon does and this isn’t Amazon.

This is RCH-Olladeals which, like its name suggests, does deals.

Me: I want to return my second order of air tags.

RCH/Patrick: We’d be grateful if you first can fill out this mandatory survey.

Me: OK, done. Now can I get my refund?

RCH/Patrick: Thank you for contacting us. Our rules for return dictate the item must be returned within 30 days, cannot have been used or damaged, and you have to pay for the return.

Me: All those dictates can be met. Now, how do I return this order?

RCH/Patrick: Please reach out to us again and we will walk you through the process.

Me: Hello again, can you walk me through the process?

RCH/Victor: We understand your position. I have forwarded your message to my manager. We will offer you an instant refund of 50% for your order and you can keep the items. Will that work better for you? I’ll be waiting for your reply!

Now I’m feeling like a contestant on Let’s Make A Deal. No one makes deals better than Glenn, so I ask him what I should do next.

He mentally spreadsheets the situation and says, “Tell them that they have a deal if they give you 50% off both orders.”

So, I reply: I have an idea that would probably work for all of us. You’re offering to give me a 50% refund on the $129 order for the three smart tags to get an instant refund — so how about if you also do a 50% refund on the first order of $90 which would allow us to wrap this up right now?

Mind you I have now worked with Patrick, Victor, and Myra and before this is over, I will also have dealt with Kris and Magi. I think they’re bots because they are *so* polite. Even gracious. They thank me for my time. They sympathize with me. They are encouraging and patient. Magi even goes so far as to say “I hope this message finds you well.”

We are now four days into this effort to do a customer refund, and I’m starting to mimic their communications style. I say things like “looking forward to hearing from you” and “can you comment on this difficulty?”

Anyway, back to our wheeling and dealing.

RCH/Magi takes my (errr Glenn’s) counteroffer, and agrees to a refund of $109.

Let’s pause for a minute and review this deal, and oh, by the way both orders have arrived and are sitting on my desk. Glenn tells me that it’s a miracle that I even got the product, never mind got it so fast.

The Deal, and why it appeals to Glenn
Full price, including tax and shipping, I purchased five air tags $219
That’s $43 per air tag.
Half of the full price, plus tax/shipping is $109
That’s $22 per air tag.

Full disclosure, Glenn had to write this down on a piece of paper for me because I simply could not do math. Glenn not only loves to do deals, he already has plans for the extra air tags.

I get back to Magi who says:

RCH/Magi: Good day, thank you for considering this offer (my thought bubble: This can’t possibly be a member of the human race, only a bot would say this.). As agreed, we have issued you a refund and you can keep all of our products.  

Magi is now truly my friend and our pleasant time together as we build a relationship based on fraudulent practices is coming to an end. Magi bids farewell saying:

RCH/Magi: We truly appreciate your understanding and patience throughout this process. If you need more assistance please don’t hesitate to reach out. Kind regards, Magi.

And thus concludes this episode of sketchy, online weirdness.

Oh, and did I mention that someone else outdid me on my 50% deal with RCH-Olladeals?

Yes, indeed this reviewer got them up to a 75% discount:

My wife ordered one product and received THREE. When I emailed them to get a return address for all three items, they kept offering me discounts — up to 75%!

What I learned from this experience

Even if you think you know what a scam looks like, you may be surprised. Online purchases can take a lot of twists and turns. Check and double-check the parties involved in your potential purchase. I now realize I didn’t place a second order – I never got a receipt or confirmation of purchase like I did for the first order that I actually placed.

• Is it a scam if you get the product?
  Yes, receiving a product you didn’t order can be a “brushing” scam where you receive an unsolicited order along with the original order that you did place. The product itself may be real, but the act of sending it is deceptive and could be part of a larger scheme where the seller has also used your personal information and may attempt to phish for more data.
• Is it a scam if there is no way to return the order for a refund?
  Yes, especially if a “discount” is presented as the only option instead of a refund and you are unable to get your money back for an item you cannot or do not want to keep. This is a common tactic and is a way to pressure you into keeping the product instead of getting your money back.
• Signs of a scam:
  Refusal to refund
  Unrealistic discounts